Wednesday, June 20, 2007

In Defense of Seacukes. . .Part One

A friend brings up some valid points about the sea cucumber. I have been a little too hasty and harsh in judgment. Now I must make amends to these hapless echinoderms for comparing them to the alleged "higher form of life" vertebrates that roost in the highest echelons of the U.S. government in Washington, DC. who seem to have neither enough natural predators nor a whole lot of redeeming qualities in terms of our delicate ecosystems.

Point #1: Sea cukes are cooperative members of the earth's delicate ecosystem.

In stark contrast to the current administration's Executive and FOURTH BRANCH, sea cucumbers play a useful role and demonstrate a humility that is unmatched within the Beltway. These members of the Holothuroidea class eat abundantly of the teensy-weensy bits of biological sediment from their natural environment. Expressed in less delicate terms, sea cucumbers feast on marine fecal matter. Yup. It turns out that they're the "freegan"/scroungers of the sea-- or better yet, aquatic sanitation workers.

The Bush Junta preys on the fear of the American people. Moreover, it spews more waste than it takes in-- unless you count its cronies-- and it leaves its mess for its supposed co-homo sapiens to clean up.

Point #2 Sea cukes have a plethora of natural predators and (what turns out to be) an appropriate defense system.

Although they sport tough, spiny skins, many large fish consider sea cucumbers toothsome treats. Feisty and clever and instinctively creative, besides the yucky-yet-cool ability to spew their intestinal tracts and subsequently regrow it, they have a way that quite literally saves their asses by using their asses. When imperiled, sea cucumbers will release fine, ultra-sticky threads that surround the would-be diner. This filament, as sticky as Superglue, prevents the potential snacker from continuing its pursuit.

The current corrupt administration has the National Security Administration. It considers its fellow Americans as the greatest threat to survival.

Point #3 Sea cucumbers have natural term limits. Their usual lifespan is from five to ten years. They accept their fate without becoming belligerent or forming dynasties.

to be continued. . .

2 comments:

curator said...

. . . nor do they make noises about imposing military law when their alloted lifespan is about up.

seacuke wrangler said...

Point well-taken. . . Do sea cukes have a place in your Pet Museum?